


Fairy-Locks

by Marsalias



Series: Grandfather Clocks [18]
Category: Danny Phantom
Genre: Gen, Sort Of, crackfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-23
Updated: 2021-02-23
Packaged: 2021-03-13 09:55:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 540
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29649588
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Marsalias/pseuds/Marsalias
Summary: Proxy war via Danny's hair.
Series: Grandfather Clocks [18]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1706959
Comments: 12
Kudos: 228





	Fairy-Locks

**Author's Note:**

> This one is basically crack, sorry.

“Just because my hair is messy in the mornings does not mean that a ghost is trying to kidnap me,” said Danny, who leaned closer to the mirror to pick out the tangle. 

Maddie grabbed his wrist. 

“What?” he asked, flatly. It was too early in the morning for this.

“The stories say that ghosts-”

“Fairies,” corrected Danny. 

“Same thing if you get back far enough,” said Maddie. “Would weave bad luck into the knots. If you untie it, you’re cursed. They have to be cut out.”

“Don’t you _dare,”_ said Danny, whose hair had only just managed to grow back to a reasonable length following his last encounter with the local barber. He realized Maddie already had a pair of scissors and backed away, only to run into Jack, who had the razor clippers. 

“Sorry, son,” said Jack. 

“You have to be kidding,” said Danny. 

“We know you’ve been having nightmares, Danny.”

“Please don’t tell me you think a ghost is causing them,” begged Danny. He considered using intangibility to escape this latest of his parents’ insanity, but decided it would be too obvious. 

“They do! They sit on your chest-”

“Oh my god, you are literally describing sleep paralysis.”

“Which is caused by ghosts!”

“No.”

Danny’s hair did not survive the ensuing scuffle. 

.

Clockwork looked down at his sleeping ward in horror. He had known, of course, but, still. 

His hair. (His hair! (His beautiful hair. (This did not mean he sympathized with or understood Nephthys’s fixation on his own hair.)))

He took off his glove and brushed his hand over the soft-yet-bristly and somewhat uneven hair on the top of Danny’s head. Should he, or shouldn’t he? 

Usually, Clockwork was the very picture of restraint and moderation. 

Everything in moderation. Including moderation. 

With a little bit of ghostly encouragement, Clockwork’s fingers were soon combing through several inches of thick, dark hair. 

.

Danny gazed at his reflection with a kind of soul-deep exhaustion known only to those who were truly cursed by the universe. 

He had several options here, not all of which were mutually exclusive. 

He could cut his hair off. He could wear a hat. He could hope Maddie and Jack didn’t notice his hair had grown back. He could go tell off his usually semi-responsible semi-parental figure for doing this, because really, this was dumb and noticeable. He could hope that Maddie and Jack didn’t cut off his hair again, restarting this whole cycle. 

The mirror felt cool under his forehead, but did nothing to help with his headache. 

His parents noticed. 

.

Let it be noted that _all_ ghosts are stupidly petty and competitive, given proper motivation. Including the ones that pretend to be reasonable, responsible parental figures. 

.

A week later, Danny stalked into Long Now. 

“Daniel!” exclaimed Clockwork happily. “What brings you here today?”

Danny gestured at his hair, which currently extended all the way to the bottom of his ribcage. 

“I can understand growing it back,” he said, aggrieved. “But did you have to make it longer? Did you have to _braid_ it? They’re setting up a camera in my room, Clockwork. A _camera._ In my _bedroom.”_

 _“_ Would you...” started Clockwork, hesitantly, “like me to reset the week?”

Danny closed his eyes. “Please.”


End file.
